Gourry's Island
by Nova-chan
Summary: The slayers are stuck on a desert island. Gourry and Lina nearly starve, Xelloss breaks his staff, and Zel finds a coffee oasis, while Amelia diligently searches for them.


Gourry's Island  
  
Author: Nova-chan  
  
E-mail: quaggasaiyanbaby@aol.com  
  
Series: Slayers  
  
Rating: G  
  
Summary: It's finally happened: the slayers are stuck on an island with no food, and no communication to anyone who has food. How will they survive this? And how will Xelloss deal with his cherished staff being broken?  
  
  
  
  
  
"Ah! I just love life on the high seas!" Lina exclaimed.  
  
She, Gourry, Amelia, Zelgadis, and Xelloss were riding on a cruise ship, right in the middle of the ocean, with no land around for miles around.  
  
"I think I'm going to be sick!" Amelia wailed, as she hung over the railing of the ship, staring at the waves down below her. "The rocking boat.the smelly air.the hot sun.why do I have to be here, Miss Lina?"  
  
"Be a little grateful!" Lina exclaimed. "It's not everyday that we find free tickets for a luxury cruise!"  
  
"Yes," Zelgadis said, rolling his eyes, "I'm sure 'find' was the right word."  
  
"Oh, shut up, Zelgadis!" the sorceress yelled. "You guys should be more thankful to me!"  
  
"I'm just going to lie down in my room," Amelia said, pulling herself off of the railing and trudging toward the center of the ship.  
  
"Can I go with you?" Xelloss asked, enthusiastically.  
  
"Mr. Xelloss," Amelia whined, "I'm sick! I'm going to vomit!"  
  
"Yummy!" ^.^  
  
"Xelloss, leave her alone," Zelgadis grumbled.  
  
"Of course, Zel-chan!" Xelloss put an arm around the chimera's shoulder. "I **wuv** you!"  
  
"Get away from me."  
  
  
  
  
  
"Uhh.Captain?" the first mate asked.  
  
"Not now, son! Can't you see I'm sunbathing?" the captain responded, sitting out on deck in a lounge chair.  
  
"Sir.umm.there's a problem."  
  
The captain sighed. "What is it?"  
  
"We're.uhh.about to hit an iceberg."  
  
"You're kidding."  
  
"Afraid not, Sir."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"There's nothing as relaxing as the ocean!" Lina exclaimed, sinking down in a hot tub.  
  
"There's nothing as delicious as food!" Gourry cried, pigging out on the nearby buffet.  
  
"There's nothing as perfect as coffee," Zelgadis mused, sipping a giant mug.  
  
"And there's nothing as sexy as me!" Xelloss said, jumping into the hot tub with Lina, who hurriedly got out.  
  
"Fruitcake," she muttered, as she sat beside Zelgadis.  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen," the captain said, over the intercom, "we are currently about to hit an iceberg, so.bye bye!"  
  
Zelgadis gaped. "An iceberg? In the Bahamas??"  
  
"AAAH!!" Xelloss screamed. "We're all gonna die!!"  
  
Lina rolled her eyes. "Like we're that lucky."  
  
Suddenly, the boat hit the block of ice that was jutting out of the warm, Caribbean water. The boat stalled, then the group of slayers on board were sent flying.  
  
"Lina! Lina!" Gourry yelled. "I don't wanna die!" He grabbed onto her leg.  
  
"Get off me, Gourry!" she shouted, trying to kick him off.  
  
"Lina! Hold me!!" Xelloss cried, grabbing her other leg.  
  
Before Lina could yell and try to kick him off, she saw the ground rushing up at her.  
  
"AAAAAHHH!!!" she screamed, before landing in an infinite pile of sand. "Oof!"  
  
Split-seconds later, Xelloss, Gourry, and Zelgadis landed close by.  
  
"Oww." Gourry whimpered, rubbing his head, which he had unfortunately landed on.  
  
Zelgadis sniffled. "I spilled my coffee," he said, sadly.  
  
Xelloss looked around happily, until he spotted his beloved staff, broken in half.  
  
"Hey, Xelloss! Where are we?" Lina asked.  
  
"."  
  
"Xelloss?"  
  
"."  
  
"Woo-hoo! Earth to Xelloss!"  
  
"."  
  
"Maybe he's sleeping," Gourry suggested.  
  
"Please, Gourry," Lina replied, "You know Xelloss doesn't sleep."  
  
"Yeah, but his eyes are closed."  
  
"His eyes are always closed!"  
  
"Well, maybe he's dead."  
  
"Xelloss, seriously, where are we?" Lina inquired, ignoring Gourry.  
  
"IN HELL!!" he cried out suddenly.  
  
Lina breathed heavily, trying to recover from the heart attack she had just experienced. She loomed over Xelloss. "DON'T DO THAT!!!"  
  
Xelloss looked at her with big, sad eyes. "I broke my staff," he said, holding up the pieces. "I.I loved this staff."  
  
"My heart bleeds for you," Zelgadis muttered.  
  
"Hey, I bet you can fix it with some tape!" Gourry offered.  
  
"You can't fix it with tape, you nitwit!" Xelloss yelled.  
  
"Oh-kay, everybody STOP!!" Lina shouted. Everyone turned to face her. "If we're gonna be stuck on this island, then you guys are gonna get along, GOT IT??"  
  
The three nodded quickly.  
  
"GOOD," Lina said, forcefully. "Now, Gourry, you go gather some food.no, wait. If I send you to do that, you'll EAT it all. Zelgadis, you find food. Gourry, come with me and help me carry some firewood. And, Xelloss, do whatever."  
  
"I'm gonna go try to fix my staff," the mazoku said, sniffling.  
  
"Fine. Come on, Gourry."  
  
  
  
  
  
"What do we need firewood for?" Gourry asked, as he and Lina walked around the island, each of them carrying a giant stack of sticks.  
  
"I've told you why once every five seconds for the last three hours," Lina said, flatly.  
  
"Yeah, but maybe if you tell me again, I'll remember!" he stated.  
  
She sighed. "We're getting wood to build a hut and a fire since we don't know how long we're gonna be here. Understand?"  
  
"Hey, Lina?"  
  
"What is it??" she barked.  
  
"What happened to Amelia?"  
  
"I."  
  
  
  
  
  
"I don't believe this!" Zelgadis grumbled to himself. "There isn't any food on this island!"  
  
The closest to food he had found was grass and trees.  
  
He pulled back a giant leaf from what looked like a passage, and, to his amazement, saw a paradise, filled with beautiful women, and a spring of.coffee???  
  
One of the women approached the chimera.  
  
"Welcome to the coffee oasis, where all your dreams come true," she whispered in his ear.  
  
Zelgadis' heart caught in his throat. He pushed the woman aside, threw off his cloak and dived into the coffee spring.  
  
He resurfaced, his cheeks full of steaming coffee.  
  
"Ahhh." he sighed. "Coffee."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Elsewhere, back at the spot Lina and company had first landed, Xelloss was trying to glue his staff back together.  
  
"Super glue should work," he said to himself, nervously. "Oh-kay.I can do this.I know I can get this thing back together." SNAP! "NOOO!!!"  
  
  
  
  
  
As Gourry and Lina continued to gather wood, and Zelgadis lived in his coffee dreamworld, and Xelloss attempted to fix his staff, Amelia was back at the boat, giving a speech.  
  
"You don't understand, Mr. Captain! It is inJust to leave Mr. Zelgadis and Mr. Xelloss and Miss Lina out there somewhere! It's wrong for you to sit here and not care about them because they were on YOUR ship and YOU lost them! Mr. Captain! Please save Mr. Zelgadis!!"  
  
"Oh-kay, oh-kay, kid!" the captain exclaimed. "Just shut up!"  
  
Don't worry, Mr. Zelgadis, Amelia thought to herself, I'll save you!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Back on the island, Lina, Gourry, and Xelloss were just sitting on the sand, purposelessly.  
  
"Where's Zelgadis?" Lina asked, her stomach about to go under siege. "Where's food? I need food. Food food food.."  
  
"Food?? Where??" Gourry exclaimed, looking around.  
  
"Well, at least I'm full!" Xelloss boasted.  
  
Lina blew a raspberry at him.  
  
"ZELGADIS!!!" she screamed.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Here at the coffee oasis, we have everything you'll ever need!" a red- haired woman exclaimed to Zelgadis. "We have coffee.and we have an oasis! What more could you possibly want?"  
  
"You said it." Zelgadis ruminated, as a brown-haired girl gave him a coffee facial.  
  
"I love coffee!!" a blond cried.  
  
"Me too!!" some others joined in.  
  
"I love coffee more than life itself." Zelgadis said, sinking into the hot tub filled with coffee.  
  
"Attention, Mr. Zelgadis!" called a voice from a helicopter above them.  
  
Zelgadis looked up in awe and amazement to see Amelia, holding a loudspeaker.  
  
"Mr. Zelgadis! How DARE you cheat on me with those women??" she exclaimed. "It's not Just!!!"  
  
The chimera groaned.  
  
"I'm coming in, Mr. Zelgadis!!"  
  
  
  
  
  
"Gourry?" Lina choked out, in fatigue. "How long had it been since we've eaten?"  
  
"Gee.I dunno, Lina," he replied, in a tired voice. "I'm hungry."  
  
"You ate two hours ago," Xelloss told them, "when you tried to see if SAND was edible."  
  
"Yeah, well, it wasn't, so that doesn't count!" Lina yelled.  
  
"I miss food," Gourry whined.  
  
"Miss Lina!! Mr. Gourry! Mr. Xelloss!!" Amelia called from above them in the helicopter, along with Zelgadis.  
  
"Oh look. It's an Amelia mirage," Lina said, thoughtfully.  
  
"I didn't know they made those," Gourry uttered.  
  
"It's not a mirage," Xelloss told them. "It's Amelia, and she's come to save you!!"  
  
"Really?" Lina cried, jumping up with renewed strength. "AMELIA!!"  
  
"Yay!" Gourry exclaimed, excitedly.  
  
Amelia landed the chopper and hopped out. "I'm so glad you're oh-kay!" she shrieked, happily.  
  
"I'll see you all later!" Xelloss said, before phasing out.  
  
"Waitaminute!" Lina yelled. "He could've done that the whole time??"  
  
"Looks like it." Zelgadis sweatdropped.  
  
"Amelia!" Gourry shouted, with big, sparkly eyes. "Take me to food!!"  
  
"Oh-kay, Mr. Gourry, oh-kay!"  
  
  
  
  
  
Amelia landed the helicopter back on the cruise ship. It turned out that the iceberg had melted and caused no real damage.  
  
Immediately, Gourry and Lina jumped onto the ship and ran for the buffet.  
  
"FOOD!!" they cried out.  
  
"Hello!" Xelloss called, working on his tan in a lounge chair by the hot tubs and his taped staff.  
  
"Hi Mr. Xelloss!" Amelia said. "So, Mr. Zelgadis," she wondered, turning to him. "Would you like to go get some coffee?"  
  
Zelgadis covered his mouth with his hand, about to puke. "I'll never touch coffee again!" he yelled, running off to the bathroom.  
  
  
  
  
  
-How was that? Oh-kay, I've got three stories coming up. The Slayers go into group therapy. (Will be posted no later than tomorrow.) -requested by Guyler. One I came up with, my the summary is himitsu desu! (Work in progress.) 


End file.
